Where art the Female Villains?

Listening to 'Jail House Rock' And speaking of which; female villains. We really weren't on that topic but crime ladies and incareration tend to go hand in hand.
Question being posed; why aren't there more female villains in our books/movie/ everyday life (joking...hehe....ehehe.)  I mean REAL villains! None of this spandex-bathing-suit-catwomen crud. I feel like there is a gap in our fictional baddies. Where is the intelligent, slightly crazed, weapon trained, hard core villainess? This needs to be addressed. I think women have the same potential to be as imposing as men, granted in a different way. If only Hollywood would quit ruining them with skimpy outfits and put them into something they could move in practically. Also when they hit things aka flying objects, chunks of metal, other people, PLEASE DON'T MAKE THEM SQUEAL. Erg...


That's my beef. And it's a random one to be sure.

Signed up for NANORIMO. No one will see my face in the month of November. I suppose that's were my frustration stemmed from. Been reading current YA fiction that's on the market. Not encouraging. We need villainess'...preferably with brains.  Or any female character that doesn't whine that she isn't pretty or special...and then two chapters later discover that WHAT? I AM SPECIAL?  Also every boy within a 78 mile radius is smitten with her. Am I talking about Bella Swan. No. Well yes. THAT AUTHOR IS STINKING RICH?!
Ps. I was going to write a snarky spoof entitled Zombie Journal : My extra ordinary life in a small town where nothing interesting ever happens and also no boy will ever look twice at me because of my extreme awkwardness. Oh and I journal. So that means I'm artsy. (this may be several current books/ movies combined)
It would go something to the tune of:

In the small town of Ridldwithzombis there lived a moody, hair absorbed, slightly old fashioned tween age boy named Deadward. And an equally hair absorbed, more than moody, slightly awkward girl named Estelle. The met, were awkward times two and fell hopefully, irrationally, stupidly in love. They went on many adventures in which their love almost got them slaughtered on many occasions. The end.

Cash. Money in my bank. Oh, but wait...RING RING. Already been wrote. Dang it all.

I'll try again later with another mythical creature.

bloom

You know those moments, the ones that don't happen very often, when God literally hands you a gift. Plop.
I feel that an extraordinary something has been laid in my hands. Its like holding a child and with that all the possibilities of what it will be, could be, someday will be, someday....
Like a late birthday present or free stuff at stores, unexpected.
This is a strange feeling. Being given a chance.
Bloom.
Blooming. Seeing something you've wanted for forever and ever and it's finally, maybe, could be sliding with in reach.
I feel like crying and screaming and dying my hair white and jumping off a roof and eating a whole jar of nutella and kissing all of my friends, repeatedly. But then I over exaggerate.
And all this came of a tension day. A nerves day. Just goes to show you that God works when HE wills and what he wills.

Mad I Am

Mad I Am

I’m mad as a hatter

Mad I am

Mercury breath and shaky hands

Eyes as wild as a brawling man

I’m mad as a hatter

Sad I am

Joker grin and pumpkin hair

Nothing but a young’in that I dare scare

I’m mad as a hatter

Sam I am

Coat of green and spider legs

Dormouse poem, tea drunk to the dregs

I’m mad as a hatter

Damn I am

Lead colored eyes, absolutely no plan

Try to find an Alice, let’s see if I can

I’m mad as a hatter

Mad I am

Mercury, hats, unbirthday plans

This crazy world spins at a flick from my hands

Also poem. To complete this mad morning.

Roofers should be done away with....

Well, hello there!

And what's that sound reaching my newly waken ears? A dozen grubby boots? A thousand tinkling hammer

strikes? Hark! Loud brutish, trampers, prancing and dancing upon my roof like so many Christmas Reindeer.
VOOM!

ALL ROOFERS SHOULD BE QUIETER.

it's not like there tearing up our roof or anything. Not that hard guys....anyhoo. That's been my morning. I'm

positive that my brain will duplicate the sound once these bounders have left. Also I was asleep when they

started so once I woke up I rolled out of bed, absolutely stunning, as anyone who has just woken up from the

crappiest sleep of the century is bound to do! RUN ON SENTENCE! Long and short my window was

open, like wide open, no blinds open, in my PJs open. Thank God I didn't have my contacts in or I would

have seen their horrified, eyes burning faces. I should have just snarled MEDUSA IS HERE! and slammed

the curtains. But one or more of them might have fallen off the roof and lawsuits are nasty little beasts.

I'm off to get some coffee...also my snake wig, because opportunities should never be wasted....but that's just me.